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And more and more, I found that I didn’t 15 to us.) The following Friday we went to her house
5
want to do what JLMP wanted to do. Like one where Mr. Lehrman showed us how to use his
time Lauren wanted me go to the yarn store in camcorder so we could tape a sketch we had
Harvard Square with her so we could both learn written, which used the characters in Gap Girls,
to knit. I reluctantly used my allowance to buy a that old SNL sketch with Chris Farley, Adam
Narrative
skein of yarn. Who was I knitting stuff for? If I gave Sandler, and David Spade dressed up as female
my mother a knitted scarf she’d be worried I was Gap employees. Mavis played David Spade and
wasting my time doing stupid stuff like knitting Adam Sandler. I played Chris Farley and all the
instead of school work. Presenting a homemade other characters. Sometime around then, Mavis
knitted object to my parents was actually like and I became real friends. Friends at school.
handing them a detailed backlog of my idleness. I spent most of winter break with Mavis, 20
And Jana, sweet old Jana, was crazy about going to Harvard Square to see movies and buy-
horses. Like super-nutso crazy about horses — that ing comic books. I discovered she wasn’t into
was her thing. All her drawings and back-from- going shopping as much as JLMP had been, but I
vacation stories and Halloween costumes were had my mom and Aunt Sreela for that, anyway. I
horses. She would even pretend to be a horse still considered JLMP my best friends, but began
during free period and lunch. We had to feed flaking on them more and more. Jana’s mom
her pizza out of our hand, and she’d neigh back even called my mom to tell her how hurt Jana
“thank you.” Now I was getting bored of driving was that I missed a big horse show. One Friday
forty-five minutes with her parents to the eques- evening in mid-February, Mavis and I were at
trian center to pretend to care about her galloping the RadioShack trying to find a tripod to use
back and forth in her horse recital or whatever. with her dad’s camcorder. It was the mall with
I found myself wanting to spend more time JLMP’s Cheesecake Factory. On the escalator ride
with Mavis than JLMP. I spent the week looking down, you could see right into the restaurant.
forward to Saturday so I could write sketches That’s when Mavis and I saw it. Jana, Lauren,
with her. I didn’t want her to be my secret friend and Polly were sitting in a booth together. They
anymore. were laughing and talking over a slice of cheese-
One Friday in November I didn’t go to the cake, but without me. Just JLP. I was so hurt and
Cheesecake Factory with JLMP. I asked Mavis if embarrassed. Yeah, I had made another friend,
she wanted to hang out at the mall after school. but did that give them the right to orchestrate a
We had never spent time together outside of our hangout where I was so left out? For a second, I
houses. Mavis was surprised but agreed to go. We hated Mavis. I wasn’t sure why, exactly, maybe
went to the Arsenal Mall after school. We bought for witnessing this humiliation, or for unwittingly
sour gummy worms at the bulk candy store; we being the cause of it? My immediate reaction
walked around Express and The Limited, trying was to rush over to them and confront them. But
things on and buying nothing. It felt weird being then I thought . . . why? What was I going to do
with Mavis in the real world, but good weird. with them after I confronted them? Sit with them
The next Friday I bailed on JLMP again so my and gossip about all the things I didn’t really care
brother, Mavis, and I could see Wayne’s World about anymore?
together. We spent the whole night afterward Mavis said, quietly, “If you want to go with
chanting: “Wayne’s World! Party Time! Excellent! them, I totally get it.”
Schwing!” Mavis and I spent a long time discuss- There was something about the unexpect-
ing Rob Lowe’s emergence as a comedy actor. edly kind way she said that that made me happy
(Again, we were comedy nerds. This was exciting to be with her, and not them. For some reason, I
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